I’ll never understand..

All’s well that ends well, I suppose; until you get a book. You don’t want to read this book. It’s pretty, well, freaky. I wouldn’t read it if I had the choice, but sometimes there’s not much you can do in the way of choices you make…well that certainly goes against everything we’ve been taught.

Why do people think they know so much about how to run their lives? Some people have so much confidence in their knowledge that they not only give advice to others, they also give stupid self-help books! It’s not a question of how much you know, it’s how far you will go to prove to others that you now it all.

Then there’s the group of people that, when they receive a bit of advice — ie. a book — they read it and upon deciding they do not agree with what the book has to say, this person goes and seeks help from an impartial 3rd party. They then take that help they sought and use it to their advantage. Example) “Yeah well, ‘so&so’ said….” and that’s how desperate housewives got their reputation. Well, I guess we learned something out of this.

Wow this month has gone by soooooo fast! I just can’t believe it!! It’s being rather warm lately. Don’t get me wrong I love when the weather is warm but not too warm because I don’t want to be outside trying to enjoy the day while I’m worried about if I’m sweating or not. You know what I mean?

I love my new layout. :) Its just looked like Sen’s blog theme.  <3

Its not that I don’t like ironing, its just that I’m really really bad at it. Since I have to put on a shirt with collar today. Why? Because I said so. And because I have things to hide. X3

And iron I have, though whether I have actually managed to leave fewer wrinkles in the clothes than were there before I started is debate-able. I’d like to think I suffer from a failure of equipment, that my tiny tabletop ironing board makes it more challenging to effectively iron a shirt or pants or curtains.

But let’s be serious. We know that the issue isn’t the board. It’s the creature that wields the iron.
So I focus on the parts that show — making the plackets, the fronts and the collars look good. The backs — eh. If there’s a few entrenched wrinkles back there, so be it. Same thing goes for the backs of sleeves – -how is one supposed to iron sleeves anyway? At least without rendering the back of the sleeve all wrinkly?

But I’ve got about 7 shirts hanging with respectable looking collars, and a well-pressed, cute outfit picked out for tomorrow. XD

Well, I finally watched V for Vendetta last night. Simply amazing. I don’t think I have ever seen anything better than it. It was better than LoTR and King Kong without a doubt.

Natalie Portman was perfect in her role and Hugo Weaving was sweet as well, though the only thing we had of him was his voice. Best part was probably John Hurt. Spent the entire movie trying to figure out what movie he was from and then look over at my DVDs and see Hellboy. lol

Anyways, if you haven’t seen V yet, you must. Absolutely stunning.

Well, first off.. Sorry for neglecting this blog for so long.. I’m rather practical I don’t blog unless I feel that there is something worth blogging about.. Not those day by day bloggers haha. No offence to anyone. XD

Ever think about how annoying the little things can be ? Example: When you’re in a rush and you forget something, Your shoes give way while you’re in a hurry or having to do an extra chore for the day.. Well, I used to curse and swear alot about these things until I saw this “video” yesterday. It is actually a powerpoint slideshow with music.. What was it about? Basically it was about the september 11 attacks and how the people who were alive that were supposed to be dead sharing their stories. There was this guy who survived because it was his turn to buy donuts.. and the guy that tried his new shoes that day and developed a blister and had to go to the convenience store to get a band aid. Another one had survived because he had stopped to pick up a call. There were afew other stories which I can’t really remember but from these few examples you should be able to get my point. We shouldn’t always think negatively about all the annoying small little things but be thankful because it is possible that it all happens for a reason. And that may very well save your life. So now we should all try to start everyday on a positive note and no matter how bad the day might be we should tell ourselves its all happening for a reason and one that may be good at that. ^^

I’m annoyed at the moment, and I wish to analyze this.

There is a certain person who gets under my skin.  I must physically restrain myself from rolling my eyes at him.  He’s a very nice guy, he’s intelligent, he’s a good writer, but he drives me crazy.  He makes these inane references to pop culture or cultural icons in the oddest places, so that the discussion loses something in the discussion of them.  He brings up the same few books over and over and over, and they don’t necessarily fit.  Ever.  Anywhere.  And he is…  how should I put this?  Trying to go down a path, or planning to go down a path, without the proper tools.  His tools are all wrong.  They are fine tools, but they are good and appropriate for other journeys.  Other endeavors.

Does he annoy me because I am afraid there is something of him in me?  Perhaps.  Do I think I am better than him, per se?  No, of course not.  I don’t think I’m better or worse than anyone else.  We all have our own way of doing things, of looking at the world, of being.  He spouts these things that don’t make any sense with authority.  I don’t think I do that, though when he is talking and I’m wondering what the hell he is going on about, I wonder if people think that when I speak.  I’m not the best at articulating myself, of getting my point across, and I know that.  But at least my approach is formalist, I just thought.  As in, at least I use relevant information.  I thought that in a very condescending manner.   Especially since I make connections between disparate things.  But I don’t say them out loud?  What does that mean?  At least he tries, I tell myself.  And he is a nice guy.  And we all have our own ways of looking at things, and I definitely think that is a good thing, otherwise the world would be a really dreadful place, everyone having the same objectives and approaches.  Too much competition, nothing mitigating that.  Scary.

Am I irritated because he has the balls to go after what I have given up on?  Maybe.  I’ve decided not to go that way, but perhaps I am still unsure whether I have been motivated by fear.  But, you know what?  I’m not really giving up, and I know this.  I’m still doing what I want to do, but I’m doing other things too.  I am not relegating this to a hobby, I’m not falling back on something.  I am getting everything I want.  I’m not giving up the other things that I’m going after– in addition to that common goal.  Which we don’t really seem to have in common.

Why do you hurt, Vince? Don’t you see that you were not meant to. Don’t you see that all this hurt and all this worry is unnecessary? This is not how you were meant to live your life. This is not how life was meant to be. You were supposed to be free, you were meant to BE. But you don’t – and somewhere along the way, you forgot how you were really meant to do this thing called life.

Why do you expect? Why do you expect a result of everything you or others do? Don’t you see that it is not the events that happen that makes you hurt – but your expectations.

Why do you worry? Can’t you see that there is and never has been any guarantee for anything in life – and if you thought it was – then life was not what you wanted – but a pre-written script to it.

Why do you resist? Don’t you see that you resist so many things in your life, that resisting is actually all you have time for – energy to do. When will you learn to stop resisting the changes in life. Everything changes – and there is no use resisting it. Because you cannot.

Why don’t you love yourself? Do you see that putting yourself last, will result in – ending up last? Why don’t you put yourself first – thus inhabit enormous resources for others as well? Loving yourself is not a selfish act – loving yourself is ensuring that everyone around you are being loved as well, because you cannot exist without the relationships you form with others – friends, family, partners, children…

Why do you judge? Do you think people will strive to be their best potential if you put them down? People strive to be what we expect of them! See people as they really are – not like YOU want them to be – and love them for that. Then they will do their best to be what they are.

Why do you judge yourself? Did you know that you are the creator of everything that happens in your life, and that judging your creations is judging half of yourself? You cannot be one with yourself unless you learn to love every aspect of you. If you deny your other half. If you don’t like what you’ve done or what you’ve created in your life – bless it, love it, put it away and simply choose again. Life never runs out of second chances.

Why do you limit and restrict? Didn’t you know you were meant to break all barriers and discover all horizons? Didn’t you know you were free of boundaries – now and forever, and that your sister is to?


...I don't know why you people are reading this. Anyway, I will have you know that this blog/journal is probably the only place I can express my feelings freely. If you think you know me, I would appreciate it if you would respect my privacy, especially since I never name names nor publish pictures of the people. I need an outlet. This is my therapy. I need this. And I am cuter than you. Please respect that. Thanks.


February 2016
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